Day 3

I didn't want to get up out of bed.  I woke up early and knew the nudge was to go workout, but I just didn't.  I talked to God for a while and asked Him for comfort and some sign that He was listening, and that He wasn't distant.  When I dragged myself out of bed, I checked my emails and there was one from someone I knew, but not well, and thought maybe it was just spam.  I almost deleted it without reading, but decided out of curiosity to at least open it, and there was a message from God through someone else.  Funny how He works like that.  It encouraged me, said that she was praying for me, for strength and guidance and comfort. Just the things I needed.  Hmmmmm.  I still feel overwhelmed, lonely and apprehensive, but I know that I am not alone.
I let my daughter stay home from school this morning.  She is sleeping still.  I have to be strong for her and for my son, too.  How much should they see of my doubt?  Is it a good lesson for them to see how God provides even when we doubt?  Or do I cling to my statement that He will provide and NOT show my weakness?
I love God.  I love what He has in store for us.
God, grant me the peace that I need, give me guidance and please let me glorify You in everything that I do.